Sunday morning,* I stepped downstairs to find two bowls side by side on the kitchen counter. Both had a spoon laid sideways to rest and the remains of Ben & Jerry's "Dublin Mudslide" smeared within. With the kitchen otherwise well ordered, the bowls stood out, two bright green domes inverted against a slab of stark black marble.
Remembering the ice cream Daddy and I had shared very late the night before, I smiled at those two errant bowls. Although unwashed and out of place, they looked to my eye picturesque and right--the remains of a pleasant moment together after a long day at work. Alone in the bright morning kitchen with the hardwood floor creaking beneath my feet, I realized that those two bowls were telling the real reason our family had come to San Francisco. They became for me the quaint symbol of two people (not to mention seven others) who belong together on whatever side of the country it may be. "Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone.'" Genesis 2:18.
Sometimes when God begins with a chink of insight, He kindly pries open another slab with a crowbar, and this particular Sunday was no different. The Mass readings and sermon were about "following," beginning with Elisha rising up to follow the prophet Elijah [1 Kings 1: 16, 19-21] and continuing with Jesus' words to those who would follow Him, "No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God." Luke 9: 51-62. I wondered, smiling to myself, what Our Lord would say about following someone three thousand miles for ice cream, and, in an instant, I had my answer: "they are no longer two but one flesh." Matthew 19: 6. Yes, He would think it was just as it should be.
After Mass, Maureen and Eileen frolicked at the foot of a massive bronze frieze depicting the Flight into Egypt. The older I get, the more I love the Blessed Mother--the ultimate woman's friend who has been through it all. She once scooped up her newborn Son to follow St. Joseph through dust and danger to a land unknown, all the while trusting in him and in God's care. Following Daddy to flowery and friendly San Francisco for the summer was embarrassingly tame by comparison, yet I felt sure that if she could have had a word with me at that moment it would have been, "Aren't you glad you did not stay in New York and miss that ice cream?" And I would answer, "Yes!"
Backing out from my space in the church parking lot, I found myself in the middle of a song from the distant past, perhaps not coincidentally, by a group called "Genesis":
". . . close at hand, oh I'm better for the smile you give,
And while I live
I will follow you--will you follow me?
All the days and nights that we know will be.
I will stay with you--will you stay with me?
Just one single tear in each passing year."
Music loved in high school has a way of transporting us through time like nothing else, and I found myself sitting in the back of typing class with my friend, Wendy, a blonde good-natured girl who was quick to laugh and therefore an excellent companion. She was writing something in a large, rounded and swirling handwriting, encased within a hovering heart flanked by feathery wings, "John loves Wendy." Beneath this proclamation, she had copied out the words to their song, "Follow You, Follow Me," by Genesis. Wendy had a class ring on a chain, a diamond-studded ankle bracelet, and a football jacket, and I admired her wildly, thinking she had reached the highest pinnacle in life. She and John had attended a Genesis Concert the weekend before, and this seemed to me like heaven itself.
Waiting at the light, I wondered what Wendy would think if she could see me now? My guess is that the dear girl would enshrine my husband's name and mine in her notebook, taking care to create a suitably elaborate winged heart, with perhaps a bit of fancy shading for good measure. She would not mind one bit that I had borrowed her love song as the theme for this summer. After all, I have two rings on one finger, two tell tale bowls of ice cream, seven children--and someone to love who will always be worth following anywhere.
[Posted with a prayer for husbands in the military, the loving wives who follow them, and those with husbands fighting overseas who would love to follow but cannot.]
*Sunday, July 1, 2007
Oh Alice, another beautiful post! And of course no sane man would want to leave a wife as wonderful and beloved as you on the other side of the country! Blessings to you all.
Posted by: Kimberlee | July 12, 2007 at 04:09 PM
Thank you, Alice for this beautiful post. It brought tears to my eyes.
Posted by: KC | July 12, 2007 at 04:10 PM
Oh, Alice, thank you so much for this!
I'm T-minus 11 months and change from following Paul to the Arctic circle (otherwise known as South Bend, IN -- being a Southerner through and through, my blood freezes around 60 degrees F). Thank you for the reminder of why the cold, the uncertainty of the job market, and everything else will be worth it.
Posted by: Layla | July 12, 2007 at 04:25 PM
Alice, what a lovely post - I was very moved by your obvious love and devotion.
Posted by: Cindy | July 12, 2007 at 04:56 PM
Your thoughts are lovely and worth pondering on, as always.
Posted by: aussieannie | July 12, 2007 at 06:13 PM
I was thinking at the beginning how right you are and how much I wish I could follow my David. I'm just a shadow of a soul without him. And now I've gotten to the end, but you've already thought of those of us left behind, and so now I'm just crying. (Crying is good, though!) I love you, Alice. Really.
Posted by: Jennie C. | July 12, 2007 at 09:27 PM
I love that your husband is so obviously your best friend! This is a beautiful reflection!
Posted by: Alicia | July 12, 2007 at 09:34 PM
I knew coming here real quick, just before bed, would be worth the time ~smiling~
Gulp, sniff,sniff - you said it all so perfectly.
hugs and prayers
Posted by: Lynn | July 12, 2007 at 10:55 PM
Alice -- I seriously admire your memory. High school typing class and what Wendy wrote on paper? Incredible! I can't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday!
Posted by: Barbara | July 13, 2007 at 09:20 AM
Beautiful.
I have always loved that song, & Genesis for the meaning I hear.
Posted by: Mariposa | July 13, 2007 at 11:48 AM
Lovely!
And what sort of ice cream is Dublin Mudslide? Where I am, we have a very limited menu of Ben & Jerry's!
Posted by: Beck | July 13, 2007 at 01:43 PM
Wonderful Alice!
Posted by: Suzanne Temple | July 13, 2007 at 11:38 PM
Alice,
What a wonderful relationship you and your husband have. Those times like that, sharing ice cream after the kids go to bed, are some of my very favorite with my husband. Thank you so much for the prayer at the end too, it means so much!
Posted by: Jess | July 15, 2007 at 01:13 PM
Alice,
This is my favorite blog post ever. I love how you see the goodness and beauty in every moment and treasure them. I am in tears! God bless you all!!!
Posted by: Marybeth | July 23, 2007 at 11:49 AM